Communication is a means of understanding yourself and others where our internal communication can be enlightening, delving deep within ourselves to find our truth as it is the spirit in which communication is carried out that makes it a means to grow better each day inside out but in any relationship, it can be a boon or a catastrophe.
Partners rely a lot on verbal communication and we cannot expect others to know and understand what we feel without properly communicating our wants and needs to them.
Many times when this is not done it puts a strain on the relationship and creates a gap between the partners. In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Dr Rashi Agarwal, Psychiatrist and Mental Health Expert, shared, “Good communication promotes motivation to engage in tasks at hand as well as brings clarity for problem-solving. To say the least a good message communicated effectively will bring about a positive change in personal attitude and turn affects their thoughts and behaviours, when done repeatedly also affects it long term.”
She suggested 3 ways to ace the art of communication in a relationship:
Be a good listener – The best way to communicate well is to listen well. This is what most of us lack in day-to-day life, we are so much in a hurry of giving our opinion or just stating what we know that we forget to listen. Communication becomes just a state of exchange of information rather than coming to any conclusion.
Being present at the moment – Are you and your body language showing that you are interested in taking this conversation further or are you busy on your phone or looking around? When one seems distracted and disinterested other parties might also withdraw from the conversation and lead to withholding information that might have been crucial to the said discussion.
Watching your tone – Many times it’s not about what we say but how we are saying it. Many things communicated via good intentions with a bad tone can come out to be interpreted completely differently. So note to match your intentions to your words and body language to get the perfect balance in your relationship.
Adding to the list of points to consider, Dr Meghana Dikshit, Author, Brain and Performance Expert and recommended:
Keep your inner space free of conflict with yourself and the world – Work on yourself to release the mental and emotional baggage consistently, so that our past experiences don’t repeat in the future in your relationships.
Be interested in finding out the truth – Usually we are able to see what has to change for the other person in a relationship and we get stuck on it. What are you contributing or not contributing into the communication that has brought it to the present state has to be factored in.
Respect yourself and others in any communication – A mutual give and take in the mental, emotional and physical aspects of a relationship is essential for it to grow, nevertheless, it should never be a choice in the case of respecting your own and others’ wants and concerns.
Kanchan Rai, Mental and Emotional Wellbeing Coach and Founder of Let Us Talk, insisted, “Communication is an essential key for a healthy partnership and discovering each other. In close relationships, communication is a tricky art that can either lead to phenomenal or catastrophic outcomes.” She listed a few pointers to ace this art:
To improve communication in your relationship, you must discover how to listen, not how to talk. By listening properly, you are able to clearly understand the message your partner is sending through and vice versa. Ask questions, listen, support and learn about each other. Random guessing, over-thinking only lead to further complications. Even after years of togetherness do not expect your partner to automatically read your mind.
Expressing yourself honestly and respectfully
Say what you mean, make your feelings and your needs clear. Beinghonest and open should be at the top of the list for how to improve communication in a relationship. Walking away from arguments and situations due to the fear of conflict will lead to piled up misunderstandings in future. When you disagree with something, express it to your partner respectfully, hear each other out and find a common ground.
Empathy and understanding
Your intimate relationships should be your safety nets from the rest of the world. Empathy allows you to validate your partner’s feelings and give them the confidence that they are not wrong in such sentiments. Listening to each other in a non-judgmental way builds trust and allows your partner to open up to you.